Wednesday, 13 April 2011

About being a Mum

I didn’t expect yesterday’s post to make a lot of people smile Smile. But I’m glad it did. I too like reading stories about motherly/fatherly love and what parents will do for their kids.

I am far from perfect and I am still learning (struggling most of the time) to be a good Mum. A lot of the times I feel like I fail miserably as a Mum especially after I have a big fight with Miss 11 or getting so annoyed with Miss 7 or when the girls don’t listen to a word I say or when I feel like I have to nag them all the time . The Other Half said it’s because I have too high an expectation of myself and also too high an expectation of the girls. He said if I lower the bar a bit then I would be much happier.

Most of the time I think he is right and I need to learn to chill out a bit and accept them as kids.

I think all Mums can understand how I feel especially the part where you feel like you are the worst Mum in the world and how you wish there are manuals on how to be a super duper Mum all the time.

Someone asked me the other day who’s the garang parent between The Other Half and I.

I answered, “both of us are!

Kesian our kids kan dapat parents yang dua2 garang, hikhikhik…

(But so far they haven’t wanted to run away from home lagi macam I masa kecik2 dulu bila kena marah dengan my parents, heeeee……).

So, little things like making the special nut butter for Miss 7 and getting a big smile and thank yous from her, making their lunches everyday and hearing them say that they love their lunches, playing with skipping rope with them in the backyard and hearing their laughter make me realise that I’m not a total failure as a Mum.

Now….if only I can learn to take a chill pill occasionally, life would be perfect for me and for the girls and for The Other Half (who has to be the referee all the time), hehehehehe…..

Like my seafood paella tonite, it wasn’t perfect because I didn’t have medium-grain rice so I had to use long-grain rice and it ended up tasting a bit like nasi goreng, hehehe……

IMG_8748

On the stove top with the rice half cooked and I’ve just added the raw seafood mix on top of the rice.

IMG_8750

From a bird’s-eye view (sebabkan I kemetot, kena panjat the steps untuk ambik gambar ni, hahahaha).

IMG_8756

After it’s done and ready to be served.

IMG_8757

Close-up view Smile.

33 comments:

ibh said...

Emmm..masuk sini mesti tergoda tgk makanan..hehehhehe...

kella said...

nice.. sangat nice.. takda resepi kah? buleh cuba !
kata orang menjadi seorang ibu sudah cukup untuk seseorang menunjukkan seseorang itu wanita sejati..sempurna.. bgaimana pula kalau yang belum jadi ibu lagi macam me ni? hehe.. belum wanita sejati kah? hahaha i wanita sejati yu... :) ya.. i pun mahu punyai anak.. cuma belum sampai rezekinya lagi.. percaya dengan ketentuan illahi.. redha.. :D

suka tengok uols... :)

Sizuka said...

K.min,

baru je pagi tadi I had to marah Iman over her attitude towards Iffah. Memang pening la. Sakit jiwa pun ada. I feel like running from home. aci tak? :)

Anna Da Lady said...

Aala..mana resepi..Nampak sihat ni...tambah2 kalau orang tu suka seafood macam saya...hehe...betul tu, saya w/pun tak kawin lagi, bila tengok anak2 buah or sepupu yang kecik2 ni buat perangai rasa geram jugak...buat perangai tak kena tempat...tu baru anak buah or sepupu belum lagi anak sendiri..hehe

Dinas Aldi said...

My mum pun garang masa I kecik dulu tapi tak pernah terfikir nak lari dari rumah pun, kihkihkih! Ini betul2 rumahku syurgaku punya :D

blu4sky said...

LG, chill out...i think most mom mmg mcm tu.. it's not we have high expectation but we want the best for our kids and tak nak diorang susah di kemudian hari..

the nagging part...who doesn't nag.. klu tak cakap tak ingat.. klu cakap kata bebel ye...hahaha..

you take care ya...

Intan ~ Nur Azlina said...

kak, share resepi boleh?

lemongrass said...

Sue,
Nak masuk sini kena lepas makan kenyang2, hehehe ;-)

Kella,
I tengok kat OZ ni ramai yg ada anak2 tp perangai memang mcm bukan perempuan sempurna or sejati. Kita tengok pun gerun, hehehe. So kiranya, tak semestinya kalau ada anak tu perempuan sejati, cuma perempuan tu 'subur' aje :-).

Shidah,
Samalah u dgn I, slalu gak I marah Alya sbb perangai dia dgn Zahra. I tak tau lah nak buat mcm mana lagi nak bagi dia more caring sometimes. Rasa mcm cakap dgn walls aje kan!

Anna,
Tu yg part we all strict sgt2 dgn the girls, perangai diaorang with people. I pun klu tengok budak nakal, rasa nak cubit2 aje kadang2 pastu rasa bersyukur sgt2 yg my kids tak nakal mcm tu :-D.
Recipe nanti I letak ye sbb I main campak2 aje.

Dinas,
I ni dulu drama queen, tu yg asik ingat nak lari aje bila orang marah I, hahaha.

Blu4sky,
Tu yg sometimes I have to keep on saying to myself, 'ignore it. it's not important bila I geram kat diaorang.' hehehe.
I nak lah jumpa Mak yg tak pernah nag ni and nak belajar dr dia, hahaha

lemongrass said...

Intan,
Nanti I letak recipenya ye :-)

somuffins said...

LG
Both your entries, smlm n hari nih punya.. buat I smile goat aje, hehe.

Your meal is so perfect to me. You are great as a mum. Rajin benar hidangkan berbagai jenis makanan.

A~ said...

apa nama menda mcm rooftop yg u guna utk masa paella tu? rasa cam nak beli tapi tak tau nak guna utk masak apa.
terharu i baca ur post semalam tu. u r so lucky to be able to enjoy being a parent.. i ni ntah bila la agaknye... rezeki blom sampai..

lemongrass said...

Cik Som,
hahaha...I pun selalu smile goat jugak esp bila anak I ckp entah apa2 :-).
Orang spanish sure akan geleng kepala klu kena makan my paella tu sbb tak pass piawaian diaorang :-).

A~,
benda mcm rooftop tu tagine tapi yg I pakai ni cuma cast-iron pan biasa cuma flatter n wider aje. I pun teringin nak beli tagine tapi bila fikir balik, bila aje yg I nak pakai, terus tak jadi beli, hehehe.
I love being a Mum but occasionally it comes with 'hair-pulling' parts :-).

MULAN said...

wallaaa... so menggoda...!!!

kudos to u supermum..!! nak jgk rasa cashew-walnut butter tu la..

Naomiehasmi said...

LG, sedap2 betul nampaknya masakan u...u're really a great mum...!..

Rima said...

LG
Cakap pasal anak anak ni memang never ending story.. this morning sonia baru kena naughty corner.. kita suruh dia take a nap dia boleh menjawab dgn muka bersahaja.. its not night time.. its day time.. i dah sleep.. grrrr.. then bila kita suruh dia naik atas dia boleh buat bodoh and say something that agitated me big time.. tu yg terus kena naughty corner.. part kena naughty corner dia punya pekik orang ingat i pukul anak.. haizz

Come next month i will be having paella day in day out hehehe

Shereen said...

LG,
Ever since you tayang your paella a month or two back,I betul-betul tergoda.I siap beli paella pan,you..but until now,the paella pan is still shiny new..hikhikhik.
I think kan LG, it is our Asian values that make us to be the monster most of the time.To us semua kena perfect.Benda yang laidback-laidback ni memang la I tak berkenan and to me if nak buat something,it must be done perfectly.No 2 ways about it.Whereas,our hubs kan mat salleh and these mat salleh species kan very gentle in life approach.Kita sebat anak sebab sayang but to them it's child abuse!Even my son is finding it hard to have me as a mom as my Asian values is too strong compared to his friends.Am I a failure?...my late mom used to say that I eventhough anak sorang pun garang..beranak operation,tak sakit sebab tu la I tak sayang anak.

mamasuri said...

iye lah kak..
sy pun garang kat anak saya
even baru nak masuk 3 thn
cubit2 manja tu confirm ada kalau dah buas sgt..
hehehe..
sedapnya seafood paella tu..
tp hubby sy taste kampung kak..masak ni confirm kena bebel..uhuk2...

zeta said...

nmpk sedap sggh walaupon masa belum siap msk lg.. :)

alina said...

where on earth to find the manuals on how to be super duper mom tu kak? saya rela je nak beli.....

Kalau berleter je selalu dorang bosan.....
Kalau tak berleter dorang lupa.....abis cane?

Tapi bila pergi motivasi ibubapa dgn Fadzillah Kamsah kata dia ' utk melihat anak2 berjaya hendaklah di pesan atau diingatkan sekurang2nya 200 kali pesanan '

Natrah Norlin said...

terharu n sebak bila baca entri sis kali nih.saya pon seorang ibu dan tak penah merasa kasih sayang ibu.hanya menumpang kasih saya atuk dan opah.saya sendiri selalu letak harapan tinggi pada anak2..dan harap sangat2 dorang berjaya dunia dan akhirat.apa-apa pun anak2 sis memang bertuah kerana mempunyai seorang ibu seperti sis n ble ke nak jadi anak angkat sis nih ahhaahhahahaha...

p/s : pot merah tu cantik la..

afid said...

emak2 memang begitu..hihihi..menariknye kaler2..mesti sedap!

kucingorengemok said...

saya pernah buat nasi goreng kat hostel uni dulu, budak kenya tanya buat paella ke? masa tu baru je tiba uk, paella pun tak pernah dengar lagi, hehe

lemongrass said...

Mulan,
For my tastebud, peanut butter lagi sedap, hahaha. But if my hubby were to ban peanut butter in this house, I can survive on that cashew-walnut butter :-D.

Naomi,
thanks for the vote of confidence :-D

Rima,
Hahaha...muka so angelic mcm Sonia tu pun boleh buat your heart boil jugak ke? I pun kdg2 rasa mcm my neighbours sure ingat I ni kes dera anak aje.
Make sure you enjoy the real taste of paella tau, not my version of paella yg sure tak kena langsung dgn spanish taste, hehehe.

Shereen,
hehehe...you dah beli paella pan? I pun teringin nak beli but manalah I nak letak agaknya :-).
Maybelah kan because of our asian values, our 'Mat Saleh' kids find us so garang and so strict.
My Mak pun think I am so garang with the kids but she likes it that my kids are so well behaved depan orang, hahaha.

Mamasuri,
cubit2 manje tu I rasa memang tak boleh dipisahkan lah dgn Mak2 Melayu ni kan, hehehe. I pun slalu jugak buat cubit2 manja tu :-D

Zeta,
Nampak sedap sbb the seafood nampak fresh kan :-)

Alina,
I pun akan beli and sure khatam baca in 1 day kalau ada jual manual on how to be a super duper mum all the time :-D.
I pun kdg2 malas betul dah nak berleter sbb rasa mcm cakap dgn dinding aje kan!

Natrah,
Terharu I baca bila you kata yg you tak pernah merasa kasih sayang ibu. I tak boleh bayangkan betapa sedihnya :-(.
But Alhamdulillah, ada jugak tempat untuk you menumpang kasih kan...
Kalau nak jadi anak angkat I, telinga you kena tahan kena leter hari2, nak ke? hehehe

Afid,
Mak2 kalau tak berleter sunyi dunia ni kan, hahaha

KOG,
I punya paella semalam memang serupa nasi goreng versi lembap, hahaha...

Ayu said...

aaarrrgggghhhhh....laparrrrrrrr!!!!

hm...bila baca n3 akak ni,ayu setuju dgn akak.tanpa kita sedar,kita tlh meletakkan high expectation pd anak2 kita.even ayu yg anak masih kecik ni pun ada masa mcm tu.maybe sbb kita nak ank kita jd yg t'baik kot.tu yg kita jd mcm tu.dan tiap kali ayu naik angin,hb ayu mesti ckp...bebaik nanti ada yg kena darah tinggi.gggrrr....

shiori_LA said...

rasanya sama je kita LG...semua mak macam tu rasanya....ayah ni lain skit diorang lebih relax benda2 remeh temeh diorang takkan fikir..hanya yang bergelar ibu je faham kan...

Lisa H. said...

I pun nak mencelah juga...

Give them few more years and they will be (hand in hand) defending one another... up against the big tyrant called Mommy!!!

My kids were like that... as they grow older (yr 9 and 11 now)...they would still argue, play and chit-chat ...
bila tyrant Mommy naik angin brother will come to the sister's rescue, or the sister would plead for 'mercy' on behalf ... :D

Netnet said...

this is really good
eh tapi bahan2 tu buat tomyam seafood pun best jugak kan...

i always envy pada orang yang ada anak...

kena start dating another man laa..ada calon??? ha ha ha..

zombiedaddy said...

Dulu masa saya kecik, mak saya tak lah garang sangat. Tapi saya ada kakak dua orang yang memanglah tersangat garangnya. Sorang macam diktator despot sorang lagi pulak macam jeneral draco. Saya nak tuang kicap pun diorang piat telinga saya.. ishh rasa macam nak cili je mulut diorang tu.
eh ini entry pasal mak ye bukan pasal kakak ye.. sori tersasul pulak. Nanti buat lah entry pasal kakak pulak boleh saya komen lagi.

lemongrass said...

Ayu,
I pun dari diaorang kecik sampai lah diaorang besar ni, masih jugak naik angin dgn diaorang and slalunya sbb benda yg sama aje, hehehe

Shiori,
I think ibu2 aje yg memang sentiasa fikir benda2 yg remeh ni kan. Tapi I rasa bila banyak2 benda remeh terkumpul, terus jadi tak remeh kan, tu yg kdg2 I naik hangin dgn benda2 'remeh' :-D

Lisa,
Oh God, I'm so not looking forward to them ganging up on me, hahaha. But why is it always us Mums that are the baddies? The Dad is always looked upon as the saviour, the mediator, the nice guy. I think my kids think that I'm definitely descendent from a dragon, hehehe.

Net,
Seafood tu kalau buat tomyam, memang meleleh air liur. Tapi klu I buat tomyam, alamatnya yg makan I sorang lah, hehehe.
You kena start cari calon yg ada title lah Net baru lah yr ex terbeliak biji mata! :-)

Woit Adik,
Sorang aje lah kakak yg garang giler mcm diktator despot tu! Yang sorang lagi tu teramatlah prihatin nya, menyayangi adik2 nya sepenuh jiwa, sentiasa membelanja mereka dan memasak macam2 utk mereka :-D.
Apasal saya rasa Mak saya garang sgt2 masa saya kecik dulu2 and saya asik fikir nak lari aje sampai hujung jalan rumah Aci Basiam tu?

Maya Marisa said...

LG dear,

re cashew-walnut butter - it's a motherly love, that's how i would summarize it :P

re seafood paella - my all-time fav!

lemongrass said...

Maya,
Mothers will do a lot of things kan for love :-).
we love seafood paella too but I think I like it better using the medium grain rice though.

DeLancrettLurpak said...

I need the chill pill as well..

I rasa tak cukup perform like other mothers.. :-(

lemongrass said...

Lurpak,
If you find one, let me know ok, hehehe....